Archive for the The Drunk Tank Category

Drunk Tank: On Strange Illnesses

Posted in The Drunk Tank with tags , , on October 21, 2009 by Masscis

**The Drunk Tank is a regular segment that looks into the life of your host…Mandalus. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry…you’ll go WTF?!? at some of my real life moments**


So, my wife has been complaining of a sore throat lately. I say lately…more like 3 days. Finally she goes to the doctor to get checked out. No, she doesn’t have Swine Flu. She calls me to tell me she has….SCARLET FEVER! At this point I actually heard a record scratch….wait, WTF did you just say. SCARLET FEVER…OK I heard it correctly. My wife got has contracted an illness that only exist in video games. Seriously, the last time I’ve heard scarlet fever used, I was sitting in the library back in the elementary school playing Oregon Trail on what ever passed for a computer in the ’80s.

I can still remember it vividly. Got a family, wife and 2 kids, a couple of oxen and a wagon. I head out to Oregon to make a better life for my family and I. We are trucking along when all of a sudden, the 5 pixels that depicked my wife vanished and a little tombstone pops up, follow by the text “Evangaline has contracted Scarlet Fever….Evangaline dies” If this were WOW, it’d go something like “Life crits Evangaline for 50k. Evangaline dies.”

I swear I will never do anything the easy way and if I try, I will only succeed in discovering level of FUBAR once thought impossible by all. Welcome to my life…I hope you enjoy your stay in insanity. -Mandalus